1. Hold Music Is the Same Song Everywhere
I called for help and got placed on hold immediately.
Then I recognized the tune like an old acquaintance I didn’t invite.
It’s the national anthem of “Please Stay On the Line.”
It’s not bad music.
It’s just eternal.
2. Windshield Wipers Are a Confidence Test
I walk into the store like I know what I’m doing.
Then I stand in the aisle staring at sizes like they’re riddles.
Somehow I buy two that look right and hope for mercy.
Back home, I wrestle the packaging.
And lose.
3. Waiting Hasn’t Disappeared, It Just Got Polite
We didn’t eliminate waiting, we rebranded it.
Now it has a script, a tone, and a soothing voiceover.
It’s the same delay, just wearing a blazer.
I sit there listening.
Reconsidering every life choice.
4. My Patience Has a Shorter Battery Life
I used to wait without noticing.
Now I feel every minute like it has weight and texture.
It’s not anger, it’s awareness.
Still, I sigh faster.
And then laugh at myself.
5. This Week’s Unexpected Gratitude
The human who finally answered the phone.
A real voice, with real pauses, and actual listening.
Still the best feature we have.
# # #
A Like is a quick clap. A Restack is a standing ovation.
Steady on,
Bill Black
Porch Caretaker, Humble Observer
A few more porch stops before you go:
I've never been able to successfully change my windshield wipers the first time. Usually I turn a 10 minute job into 45 minutes at least.
Love this!! 🤗