A retired guy’s weekly roundup of life lessons, small surprises, and the humor hiding in plain sight.
1. Gas Stations Have Become Psychological Warfare
This week I watched a man try to pump gas while simultaneously checking prices on three different apps, muttering, “I know it was cheaper yesterday…”
Gas prices now fluctuate like the stock market, except you can’t diversify.
Retirement tip:
If you find gas under $3, take a photo.
You’ve captured history.
2. Everyone at the Gym Is Too Young or Too Confident
I attempted the gym again.
There was a 19-year-old doing upside-down pushups…
and a 75-year-old casually benching my body weight.
Meanwhile I was just trying not to make eye contact with the kettlebells.
Some weeks your workout is simply showing up and immediately leaving.
A victory is a victory.
3. Leaf Blowers Are the Enemy of Peace
Just as I sat on the patio with my coffee,
ready to embrace tranquility…
BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.
Leaf blower.
Ten minutes later?
Another leaf blower.
I don’t know who invented this device,
but if they ever run for office, I’m voting against them.
4. Every Retired Guy Has a “Why Is This Wet?” Moment
No one warns you about this part of aging.
I put my hand on the counter — wet.
Walk into the bathroom — wet.
Pick up the garden hose — unexpectedly wet.
Life becomes a scavenger hunt of suspicious moisture.
It keeps you humble.
5. This Week’s Unexpected Gratitude
A perfectly ripe avocado.
That’s it.
That was the whole highlight.
But at this age, a ripe avocado is basically a religious event.
# # #
Thanks for sitting on the porch with me. A Like is how you clap without standing up.
If you’ve got time for one more, you might like:
